Friday, November 16, 2012

Communication in Relationships

I recently had a chance to talk to man who shared with me that his wife left him after many years spent together and that he would ask her what it is that she wanted from him. He stated all she would say is "you should already know what I want.  Ladies I hate to break it to you, but men are not mind readers no matter how much we would like them to be that for us. The movie with Mel Gibson in "What Women Want" is fiction...

Communication is key. There is not a way to get around communicating with your partner whether they are male or female. In relationships it is easy to let the ball drop and not pick it up as fast as you would have when you first met, but there are many ways to get that relationship back to where you both are satisfied.  This is the reason why I wrote Men... It's time to get a CLUE! because there are very few mind readers in this world and even though it is scary to open up and share what your needs are it is a far cry better than keeping a closed mouth.  I used to feel that as a woman men should already know what I want, but they really don't! Each of us are uniquely different and what works for one person may not for another, so they are scared to make a mistake that will turn us away from them.

I've spoken with a lot of men and women of what they needed from their partners to make it work, but both had a hard time verbalizing those needs to their partner. It's funny that we can tell our close friends what is wrong but the person who needs to hear it the most is left wondering what it is that will make us happy.

This book does a lot of the talking for you and hopefully will open up that door to talking more freely. It will hopefully make you appreciate the good things that they do and leaving the book in the bathroom or table without saying anything is a good way to start. Many women have even bought the book for their girlfriends as a confirmation as it is written in a light non aggressive manner that hits on all the hot topics.  Men have said after reading it themselves that they saw some of their partners in this so it's not one sided. Either way, both have seen and experienced more warmth after reading it and applying it.

Here's one fun tip to keep it from getting boring - get a half dollar and keep it with you so that when you both cannot make up your mind on a restaurant or movie, etc. ... Flip the coin and just go with it. Be impulsive and go with the flow.  It takes the stress out of it and is freeing for both. Live on the edge! 

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